A Dominant with a Heart


i’ve not journaled for a few days as i’m trying to wrap my head around something. A week ago, Maximus went to the cardiologist for some chest pains that He’d not been telling me about. This was pretty upsetting to me as we do have a principle of “over-communication” in our contract, that applies to both of us, and He’d not mentioned a thing. i only found out when i overhead Him talking to the cardiologist on the phone the day before (i wasn’t eavesdropping, He was talking loud enough in His office that He could be heard in mine).

Maximus still didn’t really relay what was going on, said it was just a checkup and repeat stress echocardiogram, so i didn’t go to the appointment with Him. Mistake. The cardiologist was waiting in the wings to go over His echo and pulled Maximus in for an immediate consultation afterward. Turns out there were some changes from His last echo. He still went way over the maximum (that’s the competitive nature of Him), but things were different on the echo itself. Maximus left the cardiologist with an appointment for an exploratory cardiac catheterization and potential stent placement between Christmas and New Years, along with cardiac meds.

i heard about it over the cell phone while He was driving, in between lots of appointments. It was not a good conversation, i was confused, He was anxious and upset. He didn’t get home until 10 PM after planned Christmas shopping and dinners with His daughters, and we had a lot of conversation about what had been going on, what was happening, miscommunication, anxiety, etc. We’re better now, but it was a difficult day.

i’m so frustrated, though, and i know He is too. Maximus is in stellar shape, swims miles every day and eats healthy (He’s been consistently vegan for the past six months after His last stress echocardiogram, and Had been mostly vegan since i moved in two years ago). We thought we’d be able to keep His heart healthy with dietary changes, but it didn’t work. Everything i’ve read, every conference i’ve been to over the past eight years touts this as being the case. And it didn’t seem to work. And i don’t understand why. And i’ve heard about problems with stents clogging up and needing to be replaced. But i’m not an ass, i don’t want to not do something Maximus needs because i just don’t like it–if He needs it, He needs it. i just need to understand what is happening.

So i have questions for the cardiologist. i wasn’t there at His impromptu appointment and didn’t get to ask them. Fortunately the cardiologist understands and will do a phone consultation with Maximus and me a few days prior to the appointment.

Just have to be patient until after Christmas to ask them…

Categories: 24/7, cardiac, fear, relationship, vegan | Tags: | Leave a comment

Being Vegan at Desire

i’ve been vegan for eight years and Maximus decided to be fully vegan several months ago. We love this way of eating and generally don’t have too many problems finding food to eat when we’re away from home. We travel a lot, including internationally, and we’ve learned how to navigate restaurants and buffets to fit our needs.

Usually we’re the only “weird ones” but this morning i ran into a fellow vegan at the buffet who was having some difficulty finding breakfast items as a first time Desire guest. i shared some tips with her and thought it might be a good topic to blog about in case there are others.

  • First of all, we’re traveling, there’s somewhat of a language barrier, we’re guests in someone else’s country, and not completely in control of how our food is being prepared.  So we do the best we can, don’t want to be rude or pushy, and we totally understand and accept that we may end up eating something that’s not vegan. It’s ok, it’s not going to kill us.
  • When we travel abroad, i make little cards in the language of the country(ies) we are visiting explaining what things we like to avoid eating. You can google them to download and print. V-cards is one, Select Wisely is another. We can simply hand that to a waiter for guidance or they can take it to the kitchen for the chef. We use these at the restaurants at Desire.
  • At breakfast, there is always an amazing array of fresh fruit. I love the papaya and guava! There is an omelette station and i fill a plate of fresh veggies and ask Matildè to sauté them with “no heuvos, no queso” and she’s happy to do that. i do not worry that she’s been cooking eggs and meat on that same grill. You can get warmed corn or flour tortillas to go with it. i also include cooked diced hash brown potatoes from the buffet if they have them. And there’s salsa and hot chili sauce to add that i think is to die for!! (Not for Maximus though!) There are fruit juices, cereals you can have dry or with water/juice, breads, coffee, tea, and jams. They used to have a big pot of cooked oatmeal but it was made with milk. They added a menu item of oatmeal but we haven’t ordered it as we are assuming it’s con leche as well. If we want our typical oatmeal, we always travel with instant oatmeal packets and could ask for hot water to make our own and add toppings from the granola bar.
  • Lunch buffet. There’s always chips and guacamole, steamed veggies, rice, salads. Often there are roasted veggies, pesto, and hummus to make a sandwich with, potatoes, home fries. There is always a salad bar and if you want some of their yummy pizza, simply grab a slice and peel off the cheese and meat toppings.
  • The dinner buffet can be hit or miss sometimes. Usually there is some type of vegan-friendly entree. However there have been times where the pickin’s were slim. In that case we’ve made do with scraping cheese off some veggie dish or picking veggies out of another dish. Usually there are potatoes or rice.
  • The restaurants are great. At the sushi restaurant we’ve had veggie sushi that’s been great. At the Italian restaurant there’s always been a veggie dish we’ve had veganized. Both places we’ve presented the card and they’ve accommodated us beautifully.
  • The post-sex late night bar works too! We order a no-carne, no queso pizza–we usually have to repeat our request multiple times as they are so confused someone would order a pizza without cheese! It comes with sauce and sliced tomatoes and is wonderful! We could get a pineapple only one too, i’m sure, just have not tried ordering that combo.
  • Worst case scenario, we ALWAYS travel with food. We bring Lära bars, Dr. McDougall dry soup mixes in ziplock bags, instant oatmeal, and powdered coconut milk so we always have some food. We take that with us whenever we travel by air.

Fact of the matter–we’ve never starved! Being vegan should not deter anyone from experiencing Desire!

Categories: Desire, Sex resort, Swingers resort, vegan | Leave a comment

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