i so apologize for being absent the past few months. my illness and recovery has been an adventure, to say the least. Lots has been going on, mostly with me trying to figure out my future.
This past year i have found myself more and more dissatisfied with my career. Right before i got sick, Maximus and i had a heart-to-heart about it and i had decided to prepare to head back to school to make a career change into a medical field. In fact, right after my surgery, as in three days after my surgery, i started three undergraduate courses in that pursuit. However, things at work, as in a big project i rocked while working light duty, made me reconsider that and i decided to do some things to make myself more marketable for administrative positions in my field. my hope was to get a position in Seattle and then Maximus and i would be together. However, i’ve not been able to land a position and in the process, i’ve discovered that i really don’t want that position anyway.
But what i want is to be happy, and i’ve not been happy with my career. And i’m not happy being apart from Maximus.
We went back to Hawaii the end of May/first of June, back to our favorite place in Kona. i was fairly miserable, feeling obligated to work on a huge work project that i was not enjoying but unable to get myself to do it–to the point of feeling ill. While enjoying drinks at a beach bar, Maximus and i were sharing dreams of living in Hawaii, He working and traveling from there, me just being His sub, retired, happy, when He said, “you know, we can totally do that now. you don’t have to work.” i wasn’t quite sure how to respond to that, and actually wasn’t sure i even heard Him right. So i just didn’t respond.
But two weeks later, i brought it up. And after some soul searching and evaluation of finances, we’ve decided to do just that! i’m retiring. i’m getting my house ready to rent, packing up my stuff, and heading to Seattle. i have no plans, no idea what i want to do, going to let the universe decide. Maybe i’ll find a new career in a month, maybe it’ll be a year, maybe i’ll just be Maximus’ full-time sub. But what i do know is that i’m tired of being miserable.
It’s exciting, because i’ve never done anything like this before. i’ve never not had a plan. i’ve never not worked…since i was 14 years old! And i’m really looking forward to the break.
And i so appreciate Maximus and His strength, His faith, His support, and desire for me to be happy. i couldn’t do this without Him and i am so grateful.
i’m going to be blogging again. The distraction of figuring out my life dissipating. And there is so much to talk about.
Here’s to an amazing future!