Living Vicariously through Him

i’m so excited! It’s like i have a date, but i don’t…Maximus does and living vicariously through Him has got me so turned on!

Maximus is meeting with E & e tonight, the BDSM couple we met together for a meet and greet a month ago when i was up at His home. Our meeting went great and we’ve been wanting to get together, but our schedules didn’t mesh. Tonight, however, worked for the three of them and i encouraged them to get together. And i’m soooo excited!

Maximus had some concerns last week about it. He mentioned during our Skype call after the Dom text that i wrote about in Humor, the Double-edged Sword, that He was thinking about excusing Himself after having dinner with them, making an excuse that The Englishman was staying at His home and needed to attend to His guest. This was a radical change for Him, as we’ve been talking about His date with E & e for weeks, and both of us have been excited about it. It was late, it’d been a hard evening, so i didn’t pressure Him to talk about it. i did send Him a little email later, though, to check with Him and reassure Him.

So some thoughts on what You said about getting together with E & e….because, well, You know, thoughts are what i do…
my thought is that You are concerned about getting together with them after me getting upset about the Dom text yesterday. Being with E & e is not the same thing. E is her Dom. You are being invited in to help him with a scene. You will be participating (of course!!) but you are not becoming her dom nor are you becoming E’s sub. You would be most certainly doing things that are BDSM, but you are not becoming her dom. Clear distinction.
This is the eggshells concern…You not doing something You would normally do based on a recent conflict that is not related to or the same as this event at all. Misapplication of learning…
i would love for You to go. i think You, and W/we, could learn some things from them, and particularly when You are there solo. i find it exciting to learn from You what You learned from them. And they’ve made arrangements and plans to be with You.
i will never force You to do anything You weren’t comfortable with. i don’t want the reason for backing out to be because You are concerned it will upset me, when i’m clearly stating it will not. i have fantasized about it all day. Now if You get there and it’s scary and You want to leave, by all means, run! i promise you, if I had 1/10,000,000th of an inkling of concern about You going i would tell you—and i think You know by now that i WOULD (and whatever warped analysis i’d twisted it into)!
i appreciate that You want me with You. Everything is more special when W/we share it together. But i cannot be there. i want You to be able to continue to play solo, as i have, and it does not diminish what W/we have together. If You decide to go and have a great time, W/we will most certainly spend time together with them when my schedule allows.
i love you

Maximus wrote back the next morning and thanked me for the email. We spoke later and He shared that it wasn’t necessarily the exchange about the Dom text that was concerning Him, it was an issue with JB and the upcoming divorce proceedings that had rattled Him that had decreased His desire to play separately with E & e. However, after my email and some time to reflect, He wanted to keep His date with them–AND i’m SO HAPPY FOR IT!

Hopefully i’m not putting too much into this date between the three of them, but it is exciting that He will have some time with another BDSM couple in D/s that have been involved in this for quite some time. i am excited to learn from them, excited for Maximus to learn some things, see how another D/s couple interacts, and be able to do that without me there so He can show me things as His, incorporate them into our play, and not feel like i’ve watched Him be trained. It’s almost hard for me to explain. But i think that’s the crux of it, i want Maximus to have an opportunity to get some Dom training without me seeing Him get training. i think He’s wonderful and perfect, don’t get me wrong–we’re both new and don’t know what we don’t know sometimes.

And i can’t wait for the phone call tonight where He tells me all about it…We’ve done that before, shared post-date details with each other by phone immediately afterward and it is HOT HOT HOT! That was before D/s, so it will be interesting what spin and parameters He puts on me while He tells me about it–as i usually masterbate and have great orgasms while He tells me the stories.

i’ll share details tomorrow.

Categories: BDSM, communication, D/s, Dom/sub, Dominant, submissive, training | Leave a comment

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